Pick-Up Lines That Would Definitely Work On Me

Pick-Up Lines That Would NOT Work On Me. »

Pick-Up Lines That Would Definitely Work On Me

March 9, 2011 by girlonthecontrary

Bar Scene

Listen, I don’t know why I think about these things. Although, conversely, I don’t know why I shouldn’t think about these things. The moral of the story is that there is a lot I don’t know. Think about it. Or don’t. I’m not the boss of you. Unless I am…..am I? Whoa.

My old roommate and I used to text each other pick-up lines for laughs. Also, in case we met a super foxy guy walking down the street- that way we knew exactly what to say. So, I’m pretty much an expert on pick-up lines. I mean, I’m not an expert on using them, but I am really good at reciting them at parties and funerals for laughs (because if there is one place you need to laugh…….) And although they are generally cheesy and ridiculous I have to admit there are a few that would definitely work on me.

1. Your body is a wonderland and I want to be Alice. Listen, if he makes an Alice and Wonderland reference, I am ALL IN.

2. Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, just a sparkle. Oh you.

3. Hello, I’m a thief and I am here to steal your heart. Stealing is against the law, but you have to admire a guy who would risk going to jail for you. That’s called love ladies and gentlemen.

4. You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me. Rhyming=way to my heart.

5. I know we’re not in Professor Flitwick’s class, but you are still charming. A Harry Potter pick-up line?! Marry me now.

6. Hey… Didn’t I see your name in the dictionary under “Shazaam!”? Why yes, yes you did.

7. If stars would fall everytime I would think of you, the sky would soon be empty. That’s poetry y’all.

8. If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you. Come on. I mean, wow. Quality stuff. How can you not say yes to that?

Please don’t judge me. In an effort to not lose your complete respect, I will post a list of pick-up lines that would NOT work on me tomorrow. But before that, feel free to share the pick-up lines that work on you. It’s oddly liberating.

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Posted in Declarations, Flirtation Failure, Humor, Love, relationships | Tagged declarations, flirtation failure, Humor, Love, relationships | 24 Comments

24 Responses

on March 16, 2011 at 13:06 | Reply thoughtsappear

Love the Alice in Wonderland one!
- on March 16, 2011 at 13:29 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  Me too. It would work on me every time.
on March 14, 2011 at 15:42 | Reply teo

And not one in Star-Wars-Style?

“I may look like an Ewok, but I’m all Wookie where it counts, baby.” – one just wants to be under that force…
- on March 14, 2011 at 17:02 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  AWESOME. Just awesome.
on March 10, 2011 at 09:02 | Reply Pick-Up Lines That Would NOT Work On Me. « Be A Lifehacker

[...] Comments « Pick-Up Lines That Would Definitely Work On Me [...]
on March 10, 2011 at 04:45 | Reply shreejacob

I like! I like!

I unfortunately have nothing else intelligent or amusing to say.

No. 7 & 8 would so be awesome to hear, spoken with an Irish accent from someone that looked like Colin Farrell! Siiiiiigh!!!

Excuse me while I take a nap just to wander off into dreamland!
- on March 10, 2011 at 09:25 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  The Irish accent would definitely send these over the top.
on March 9, 2011 at 15:33 | Reply Pkitass

Nice pickup lines do you think they would work on guys?
If so may I use them?
- on March 9, 2011 at 15:50 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  I can’t speak for how they work on guys but please feel free to use them- and let me know how it works out.
on March 9, 2011 at 15:21 | Reply cappy @ writer's block

I think if anyone said “my love for you burns like a dying Phoenix” I’d collapse on the spot and then marry him. Once I’d regained consciousness, ofcourse.
- on March 9, 2011 at 15:24 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  Love it. Absolutely love it.
on March 9, 2011 at 13:45 | Reply marinasleeps

Are you kidding…what girl would not be swooning with these?
If someone told me #2 I would be blinded with love as he stole my purse and picked my pockets clean.
Its no sin to love!
- on March 9, 2011 at 14:10 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  Amen!
on March 9, 2011 at 11:35 | Reply xmichra

I admit, I haven’t been in the single swing for a long time… but I am pretty sure the things that worked were:
- can i buy you a drink? (why yes, alcohol is always good)
- you seem cool. wanna hang? (indeed, i am cool, I get it.)
- Wow.You are loud, crazy and really blunt! (okay, this was more an insult kind of thing, but i took that as praise for my winning personality and ended up marrying that guy. Just sayin’)….
- on March 9, 2011 at 14:10 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  That is the best “how I met my hubby” story I have heard! I am very impressed with both of you.
on March 9, 2011 at 11:25 | Reply Sarah

Oh gosh, those were hilarious! Can’t wait to read tomorrow’s.

-roomie
- on March 9, 2011 at 11:26 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  I believe you will see some familiar ones…..
on March 9, 2011 at 11:05 | Reply cooper

Lines that would work on me:

1) You have a great smile.
2) What’s your name?
3) Hello
4) I love the book you’re reading
5) Want to watch me suck three tennis balls through four feet of garden hose?

ok. i’m easy. i am a guy after all….
- on March 9, 2011 at 11:25 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  I just laughed so hard at this. Oh, Coop. You made my day. Genius.
on March 9, 2011 at 11:00 | Reply munchkn

Sadly, while I’d like to think I have more respect for myself than this, if a guy were to use a pick-up line on me, I would totally be like, “Oh my god, you actually dared to use one on ME?” My self-esteem is waaaay up there. While I have a boyfriend, and guys have been interested in me in the past, no one has seriously used a line on me. I must exude some sort of no-pickup-line aura or something. Therefore, I must get my boyfriend to use them on me for giggles.
- on March 9, 2011 at 11:03 | Reply munchkn
  
  I just asked him for a random one, and he gave me more of an icebreaker (wait for it…) line.
  
  Him: Do you know how much a polar bear weighs?
  Me: No
  Him: Neither do I, but it broke the ice!
  Me: *groan*
  - on March 9, 2011 at 11:23 girlonthecontrary
    
    Excellent line from your boyfriend. I don’t know if this one would work on me but it would definitely make me laugh which is like, half the battle.
on March 9, 2011 at 10:42 | Reply inthethreshold

Absolutely hilarious. Made me smile “OUT LOUD” – is that SOL, in today’s lingo…I think yes.

Thanks for sharing…hilarious ;o)
- on March 9, 2011 at 10:55 | Reply girlonthecontrary
  
  Definitely SOL. You are more than welcome. Thanks for stopping by!