Occasionally I will get emails asking for my help. I’m not always sure that real people are sending these. I have a strong suspicion that it’s aliens just trying to distract me from my constant alien invasion vigilance, and if that is the case then very well played aliens because I am totally distracted.
Last week, I got this email.
“Girl, should I unfollow my ex on Twitter?”
I’m not entirely sure that I’m qualified to answer this, or even why someone would turn to me for any advice that doesn’t involve alien invasion preparation or imaginary conversation starters, but I’m never short of opinions on anything so I’ll oblige this
alien person with an answer. Because I’m nice like that. And helpful. And generous. And I have a sparkling personality.
Yes. Yes, you should unfollow your ex on Twitter. Always. If Katy Perry and Russell Brand can’t continue following each other on Twitter after their divorce, what hope do the rest of us have? Unfollow immediately.
You’re welcome probable alien, I just solved your problem in like 10 seconds. Now I can get back to preparing Earth’s defense in the case of alien invasion.